Oh man...

Ok, we have a nine year old Siamese Cat named “Neela”. Neela, is Hindi for “blue” due to her deep blue eyes. I have pretty much had a Siamese my whole life and although most folks would not take me for a cat person, I love my cat. For all the cats I have had growing up, this is the first one that is “my” cat. Siamese seem to gravitate towards one person in the family and all my life it seemed it was my Mom they always gravitated to. Might have been due to me trying to shove them in the toilet when I was very young, or the fact that my Mom was the one that always fed them, or any other heinous things I probably may or may not have done with them…but I sleep good at night knowing it was the food.

Sidetracking here, but bear with me; when we arrived to our temporary housing here in DFW we found that the air-conditioning was not working! That sucks when it is 100 degrees and 99.9% humidity and is not much better when it is 95 degrees with 90% humidity. Standard procedure, we have to keep a bunch of windows open day and night so as not to wake up half-baked in a not-so-good way. Back to the main story…I also have a dog that I have written about before, the German Shepherd Dog we have. She is a bit aggressive at times, which I really like, and we really enjoy having her too. We have had issues peeling ourselves off the ceiling when one of the neighbors here are walking their chew-toys (poor excuse for dogs) along the sidewalks that are in full-view of the windows out of the breakfast nook. I have been worried that she would knock the screen out trying to get at these dogs but fortunately it had held…until today.

As I came home early this evening, I pulled in and noticed that the screen to the previously mentioned window is laying on the bush directly outside the window…aw crap. As I drove up the driveway past it, I was relieved to see Naomi quizzically stick her head out the window to greet me as I drove by. Ok, mental note, gotta get that screen back in. However, there are more important things at hand. First, I GOTTA get the DVR going as the Cowboys game is going to start within seconds. Second, I need to get my daughter changed and ready for bed, and third I gotta start eating on the pizza that my wife was bringing home!

All three issues are handled successfully for the most part, except my daughter was still running around a bit while we started dinner. We put the pizza aside as she got cranky and decided to fill ‘er up with milk and put her to bed. Standard procedure while my wife is feeding her is for me to get her a clean plug, make sure the crib is setup right, and get the cat out of her bedroom because as soon as we get the door closed (if she is in there) she starts yowling and wakes up the baby. I get everything done and cannot find the cat. I look under the bed, behind the dressers, in the closet, in the bathroom…nowhere. Now I start calling her as she will always come when I call her name…nothing. Ok, a little frantic now, I start combing the rest of the house looking for her…still nothing. Back to the bedroom as she is a sneaky little fart and is probably still in there…still nothing. Things went kinda cold for a second as I remembered the open screen window in the breakfast nook. Crap! I think the cold feeling was mostly due to knowing the cat got out but also partially that I have to explain to my wife that her cat has gotten out, is lost, and I forgot to put the screen back on the window. Now, in my defense, there is the distinct possibility that this screen had been missing for HOURS before I got home but am relatively certain she will have some proof that the cat escaped only after I got back home and I am a jerk. AND, I have to wait to watch the Cowboys game…

I casually approach my wife and ask her in a very even tone, “…you haven’t seen Neela…have you?” Well, come to find out she hadn’t…so I came clean on the window screen. Ok, now we both look through the house, each of us calling her name and there is no cat in the house. Ok, this is starting to get bad as my wife is starting to freak. “Yes, I know she is only and indoor cat.” “Yes, I know she does not have front claws.” “I have no idea if she is in the yard.” “Yeah, I’m sure she will come back…” Ok, that last one was a bit of a stretch, but I could always hope, right?

So, I get the flashlight and walk around like a hood through the subdivision flashing every house, bush, fence…everything calling out he cats name…the entire time praying I do not see a white pile of fur in the road. Nothing. The wife wants me to go knocking on neighbors houses to see if anyone has her, but here we are; new to the neighborhood, have not met any of the neighbors, and I am beating on their doors at 9:30 at night asking if they have seen my cat. The wife gets the phone number of a neighbor (I’m a butthole for not going and knocking on doors) , introduces herself briefly and then asks if there is any intel on an AWOL kitty…nothing. Ok, so I get in my truck and cruise the neighborhood looking for our fleeing feline and drive the entire neighborhood with flashlight out the window…just sure the Keller cops are going to pull me over for God knows what…nothing.

I walk back in the house and my wife is really freaked…she has just lost her cat and will never get it back. I spend some time assuring her Neela will be waiting for us outside in the morning…with little success. So, we break out the paperwork and advertise on Craigslist with the Avid chip number and description, call the animal control folks (they have great jobs, they don’t work at 10:15 at night), and she calls her parents (of course I am not qualified to offer comfort as I am the butthole that lost the cat). All the while, I’m thinking about the friend I have lost (I know she won’t be outside in the morning), the thousands of dollars spent shipping her back and forth to Kenya, and whether or not I should plan on getting another one this week?

Then the stupid cat walks out of my daughter’s bedroom…